I Was Suppose To Be Doing This Writing

I was supposed to be doing this writing, but the words aren’t coming so easily. What does come easily is typing YouTube or Twitter into the address bar and telling myself I am just going to look for inspiration. I know I am lying, but I don’t want to fight with myself, and so I let it happen. I waste an hour, and I have nothing to show for it. I try writing again, and the words are still stuck.

I was supposed to be doing this writing, and I am doing my best, but nothing sounds quite right. I type, then delete, type, then delete until I think maybe a beer and a cigarette will help loosen me up. I get up, get the beer, and go out back to have the cigarette. On the way back in I notice the kitchen needs to be cleaned, so I clean it up. Then I notice the living room is a mess too, so I clean it up. Then I am too tired to write anything and take a nap instead.

I woke up an hour later, and I am disappointed in myself. I was supposed to be doing this writing, so I tell myself no more excuses! I start typing again and this time, I do not delete anything. I write nonsense and break every grammar rule. I write about writing and about not having anything to write about. Slowly some thoughts start to surface, and I sense coherent paragraphs forming.

I keep typing like that until I have a post. It takes me an hour, but I do it, and it feels good like I knew it would. I realize that writing isn’t magic, writing is work. You have to show up and try, and try again, and again until you get it done. Sit down and write about nothing until you find yourself writing about something. I realize I am making excuses to get out of doing something because it is difficult. The next time I am supposed to be doing this writing, I will just do the writing.

This post was inspired but a post on Brevity titledConsider the Prompt. The prompt was the sentence: “I was supposed to be doing this writing, and/but/so….”. I encourage you to read the piece; it was really good!

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Published by

Lisa

Hello! My name is Lisa. I find the human condition fascinating and I often write stuff about that. I blog at zenandpi.com but you can also find me on Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram, and if you like what I do, consider signing up for my newsletter. Thanks :)

4 thoughts on “I Was Suppose To Be Doing This Writing”

  1. If those are truly the thoughts that run through your head when you should be writing, I am glad I am not the only one. If that was just your superb writing skills channeling a procrastinator, good job! Either way, I enjoyed it. Funny how cleaning the kitchen moves up on the, “I should really do this,” list when procrastinating.
    Thank you for sharing,
    ~victoria

    Like

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