This is not about all pretty girls. This is about the pretty girls who use their looks to take advantage of others. This is about the pretty girls who keep themselves stupid and bat their eyes to get what they want. This is about the pretty girls who shit on the girls with big hearts and brains. This is about the pretty girls who only see other girls as competition and put them down to further their own ends.
Not too long ago I wanted to be one of those pretty girls. The ones who get all of the attention and are worshiped by the boys who want them and the girls who want to be them. I would see them at work or at parties and everyone would be complimenting them and offering them drinks. To me, it seemed like they had it all, and what they didn’t have they could easily get. The pretty girl always looked like she was having the time of her life. The pretty girl had no worries. Oh, what I wouldn’t have given to be one of them!
After being around girls like that I would go home feeling ugly and unwanted. I started asking my friends if I was attractive, they always told me I was but it just didn’t make sense. Nobody ever said I looked good unless I asked. I figured they were lying to make me feel better. One day my best girlfriend told me I was pretty, I immediately called her a liar and she jump on me. She told me to stop thinking like that, she told me I was beautiful and I needed to start loving myself.
And so I did. I started to love myself. I learned to love my looks and to love my brains. I have more confidence now and I’m even starting to get more compliments. Not just about my looks but also about my intelligence and kindness. I now know that all of the friends I have are genuine. They like me more for my mind. I know that I’m not ugly, I just don’t have the “typical beauty” you see on magazine covers. I’m not the first girl anyone looks at in a room. I take more pride in the fact that it’s my mind that really attracts people. I’m not being cocky here, and I don’t think I’m a special snowflake. These are just the things I have been told over and over again by other people.
After that, I started to pay closer attention to what the pretty girl was doing. I often saw the pretty girl barking orders and making unreasonable demands. “buy me this”, “take me to lunch”, “give me ride here or there!” she would smile why saying it and even give a laugh, but I could see she didn’t care at all for the person she was demanding things of, she only wanted the power. She only wanted to have her needs met and she pretended long enough to get it. The pretty girl also demanded constant attention from those around her. She would talk over everyone around her, and gossip or bad-mouth others to make herself look better. The pretty girl was not comfortable unless everyone could see she was pretty.
There are many girls out there like me but a lot of women are still too busy trying to be the “pretty girl”. I know I was for a long time. Looking back now I think it’s sad. I hated my body because I didn’t look like them. I hated my mind and curiosity because I thought no one wanted to hear the things I had to say. Everything around me reinforced these ideas and the pretty girls let me know I was never going to be one of them.
That’s not to say there aren’t pretty girls out there who have brains and big hearts too. I have met more than a few and they are awesome. And to the not so pretty girls with brains and big hearts, to me, you are beautiful too. It is much more about what’s inside than what’s outside. Looks fade but intelligence and kind souls are forever.
I wonder if those pretty girls ever learn. I wonder if they ever grow and see the world from a new perspective. I hope they do. I hold no animosity for the pretty girls, I just wish they knew there was so much more to life. I try to show them whenever I’m given the chance but all too often I am brushed aside by the pretty girls. Me and my plain looks and brains make my unworthy of the pretty girl friendship.
The pretty girl rarely sees the things I have to offer, her mind only focused on what she can take. I still try, though, because the pretty girl is my sister in the struggle too and I will fight for her always. I hope one day she will see the there is more to the world than looks. I hope she will see there is more inside herself too.