Earlier I wrote about the real history of Thanksgiving and while I do hate this holiday for all the reasons I stated in that post, I can’t help but also think of the other meaning of this holiday. Thanksgiving is also about family and being thankful for everything you have….right before you go
fight to the death shopping to get each other more stuff!
Normally the holidays are not a happy time for me. When I was growing up they never went very well. When you grow up in a dysfunctional family the holidays do nothing but amplify that dysfunction and remind you that you will never have a normal home life. In my family the holidays meant my mother slowly getting more and more frustrated throughout the day until my step-father finally pushed her too far and a fight broke out. The fight usually resulted in my step-father leaving to go drink somewhere with friends. My own father wasn’t even around.
As an adult though every year those memories fade a little more and newer, happier memories are made. My family is bigger now and a little less dysfunctional. My girlfriend and I, while we don’t have any kids, still feel like we are own little family and we take time to celebrate a portion of the holidays with only each other. This helps to relieve some stress and it gives us time to enjoy and appreciate each other.
I also have my siblings, who are older now and can have a say about how the holidays are celebrated. We are no longer small children who have to sit by and watch as our parents allow their emotions to get in the way of spending a nice day amongst family. Now we can decide what happens and we can make it good for the members of our family who are going to be shaped by the memories we make with them now.
We aren’t going to be spending Thanksgiving together this year because me and one of my sisters have decided to spend it with our in-laws. This way we can all be together for Christmas. This is how we do it every year and we alternate. Next year both of us will spend Thanksgiving with our own family and Christmas with our in-laws.
I will be missing them this year and when I think about what I am thankful for, family is at the top of the list! I know I talk a lot about how dysfunctional and crazy they are I do love so, so much. We have all been through so much and we have survived and we are all stronger and better for it. There really are now words for the pride I feel in the way my family has continually made it through hardship after hardship and still comes out with nothing but love and forgiveness for each other. They are nothing short of amazing.
After that I am thankful for my amazing girlfriend. She my best friend, the love of my life, and the center of my whole universe. If it weren’t for her I’m not sure I would be here. She saved me in more ways than one and she continues to save me everyday. She has loved me at my worst and when I least deserved it. This past year with her has been amazing and I only see us getting better and better. I am thankful I have her in my life and I am thankful she loves me back.
Of course I am also thankful for everything I have in life. I am thankful for the job I have, it pays well and it makes me feel like I am doing a tiny bit of good in the world. I am thankful for the roof over my head, I am also thankful that it is my roof. I am thankful for the food in my fridge. I am thankful I make enough money to be able to not only have all that food but to be able to make heathy food choices that cost a bit more.
And finally I am thankful for everything I have had the opportunity to learn and do this year. I am thankful that I was able to start this blog and learn so much about writing that I never knew. Now I have a place to express myself and also read the expressions of others. I am thankful that I was able to learn and re-learn so much of the math I forgot or was never taught. I know now that I am smart and that I can do things I set out to do.
I am thankful I have so much to look forward to in the future. I am thankful that I have so much to be thankful for! It has been a good year and I expect that it will end very happily in a month or so. I am thankful for that too.
I hope you all have a Happy Thanksgiving and I hope you have plenty to be thankful for. And if you are participating in the national past time that is “Black Friday” I wish you the best of luck in that too!