We Got Way Too Much in Common

We got way too much in common. We both came out of broken families, one that stayed together and one that didn’t but both were broken none the less.  We emerged from mothers who couldn’t mother and fathers who did their best. We emerged wounded and raw and each a different kind of fucked up.

We got way too much in common. Neither of us knows how to escape our past and we insist on replaying the worst parts with each other. You shut down when I become too emotional and I plead with you to comfort me. We are both stuck in a loop and no matter what we tell ourselves or each other we may never get out.

We got way too much in common. We both got hurt before we could see what was beautiful in the world and we both got hurt more than most people do. We both had our bones hollowed out and our minds shattered in a scream. We both had to pick ourselves up and remake ourselves anew. We both walk on shaking limbs and possess a fragile heart that breaks everyday.

If I’m being honest with you, I have been afraid that what we have in common is what will tear us apart. I have been afraid that what we have in common is why we shouldn’t be together.

If I’m being honest with you, I am afraid the dysfunction we have worked so hard to escape is something within us. I am afraid we have the past within us and we are boud, fated even, to pass that on to our future family.

I used to ask, “Who wants to love somebody like me?” I wonder if you asked the same thing too.

You wanna love somebody like me? It’s hard to believe and hard to accept. I will ruin you and us and you will ruin me too. Still, I wanna love someone like you too.

If you could love somebody like me then maybe I am not so bad after all. If I could love somebody like you then maybe you deserve that love too.

Yeah, you must be messed up too, but maybe the kind of messed up you are and the kind of messed up I am will make the past easier to bear for us both. Maybe the kind of messed up you are the kind of messed up I am are just what each of us needs to get out of our pain.

Maybe the kind of messed up you are and the kind of messed up I am will save us from ourselves.

***

Post inspired by the song In common by Alicia Keys:

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Published by

Lisa

Hello! My name is Lisa. I find the human condition fascinating and I often write stuff about that. I blog at zenandpi.com but you can also find me on Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram, and if you like what I do, consider signing up for my newsletter. Thanks :)

One thought on “We Got Way Too Much in Common”

  1. Wow. For a moment I thought you were talking right to me. It makes me sad that this kind of thing is common enough for that to happen.

    Like

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