If We Were Having Coffee // A Direction to Head In

Hello dear readers! Happy Sunday, welcome, and thank you for stopping by for a bit of caffeine and catching up.

It’s a wintry day outside with light snow flurries and freezing temperatures and the reports promise the same for tomorrow, sadly. Snowy Mondays are the worst, but snowy Sundays aren’t so bad as long as you have nowhere you need to go. As long as you get to stay on the couch covered in cozy blankets drinking alternating cups of hot coffee while the world outside is purified by the soft white snow.

So, come, fill up a cup and join me on the couch. Let’s watch the deary world turn white while we talk about last week.

“I never knew anyone, ever, who wrote, read, loved, and drank coffee as slowly as I always do.”

Juansen Dizon, Turtle

***

If we were having coffee I would tell you that the easy work week I had so carefully planned was ruined entirely by an excruciating headache that plagued me for three whole days. I felt the first signs of it Wednesday afternoon after staying up to watch the election results and it didn’t really go away until the middle of the afternoon on Saturday. I’m chalking it up to lack of decent sleep and anxiety, and some of it to the giant margarita I had with dinner on Friday. I regret nothing.

I realized it was a sleep problem after making time—just 15 or 20 minutes—every afternoon to rest I would feel better, for a little while.

I’ve always had trouble sleeping at night. As soon as I lay down and close my eye my mind starts running. I worry about my family, about the things I said and did that day, things I said and did years ago, my eventual death, and whether or not the people who say they love me really do. If I can get through that and finally fall asleep I never get far before something wakes me up. again My girlfriend or one of the pets snoring, a car door slamming in the neighborhood, the furnace turning on, etc.

I’ve been living in a constant state of sleep deprivation and have been relying on coffee and naps to get through the day. It’s getting to a point where that isn’t enough though. So, this week I’m going to break out the earplugs and use an eye mask and see if I can get a little more rest at night. I’ll still have coffee but in the early morning only and no more naps, unless the headaches returns.

***

Despite the pain and the fatigue I still had a few moments of excitement and managed to muster whole hours of motivation and productivity. Not as much as I’d hoped for but I don’t think any of us ever spends our time 100% as we know we should. I procrastinated. I avoided. I got distracted and you know what? It wasn’t all bad. I stepped away from the screen and had some laughs. I rested. I did nothing and it felt sort of good.

I have to get back on track this week though. There’s a couple of writing contests and calls for submission I found on Medium I’d like to try for. I’m not positive I can actually finish these attempts on time but it feels good to try. It feels good to have a direction to head in.

Besides that my editorial calendar is in shambles. I’ve been neglecting my reading and my journal too. I haven’t sent a newsletter in months and it’s time I got my shit together and started writing those too. I’d love to begin posting in the new space too. I did write an introduction post and finished separating and setting up the important social media accounts so I can share it. I have everything ready to start and I still can’t bring myself to hit that publish button yet.

I just need a little more courage to take another step and start writing, finishing pieces, and posting them. I’m hoping for it this week, and maybe if I do we’ll meet there for coffee next time instead.

***

I’m also excited to get writing more now that I finally have new hardware! Last week, in the middle of my last coffee share post my laptop finally crapped out on me. I’d been researching new options for a while already knowing that it was only a matter of time and decided on this 12.5″ Asus Chromebook Flip.

I don’t usually promote products here but this thing is seriously awesome and if you are in the market for a new laptop I highly recommend you consider it. I’m still getting used to ChromeOS. Moving from Windows means my workflow is going to have to change a bit and I have a lot to learn about to do the things I need to do but so far I’m glad I made the switch. It’s nice to have something that just works.

Still, I need recommendations for a new note-taking app. Something I could use as a place to write blog post drafts and other long pieces. I love the way my work can be sorted into notebooks in OneNote but the app doesn’t work as well on a Chromebook as it does on a Windows PC. I’ve tried Evernote before but they really limit the functionality of the free version and I’d very much like to continue this same quality of writing experience and flow.

***

If we were having coffee I would tell you that I was very pleased to see every candidate I voted for ended up their races. I believe I am now represented entirely by Democrats and I’m pretty damn proud of that. A couple of ballot measures I had hoped would pass didn’t but none of the ones I didn’t, did. So, things aren’t better but things aren’t worse either and in this political climate that is something. Even if the country at large is going to shit, here at home we are still trying to do the right thing.

There were a lot of good outcomes across the country, and some we are still waiting to hear the results of, but I’m hopeful again. Now, something can be done. Now we have a chance to stop bad things from happening

I’m not sure if that makes the world feel any safer though. On the contrary, I worry it may be far less as we become angrier and more and more unable to think and speak with compassion.

***

If we were having coffee I would tell you that as much as I want to I can’t stay cozied up on the couch like this all day, talking with you and sipping warm cups of coffee with you, I have to get up and get going. I have nowhere to be but that doesn’t mean I don’t have things to do. I’m off to do laundry, wash dishes, and prep a couple of meals, and later, if I have time, I may get more writing in too.

I hope you had a good week. I hope you were able to accomplish something you’ve been meaning too, and if not just know every day is a new chance to start and you will find a way past whatever is holding you back. I’m trying to remember that myself.

Until next time, take care of yourself.

***

If you like this post check out my weekly-ish newsletter for inspiring reads + existential musings on life, love, and inevitable human suffering. Or help support what I do by sharing a virtual cup of coffee. Thanks!

Written for the #WeekendCoffeeShare link-up hosted by Eclectic Alli

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

 

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Lisa Marie Blair

Hello! I'm an aspiring writer fascinated by the human condition. I blog at zenandpi.com but you can also find me on Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram. Consider signing up for my newsletter or supporting what I do by sharing a cup of virtual coffee. Thanks :)

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