Floating, Falling

My lungs have dried to crisp and crunch.
My heart has chilled. My bones have browned.
I’m floating, I’m falling, I’m trampled to dust.

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Written in response to Ink in Thirds’ Three Line Thursday Prompt: Fall

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The Leaves Turned

The air cooled, the leaves turned, and you left me
This winter will be forever
The leaves may green, but I will never be warm

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Written in response to InkinThirds’s 3LineThursday Challenge: Autumn

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If We Were Having Coffee // Star Wars Tickets and a Quiet Fall Break

Hello friends! Thank you for meeting me for coffee this morning. I had a late night last night so I will be taking my coffee strong and I’ll ask you to excuse my tired look. I promise I am happy to see you. I love our little coffee chats and this week I have only good things to share.

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If we were having coffee I would tell you that I am so happy I don’t have to work tomorrow. I don’t have to work because tomorrow is the first day of fall break. Working for a school district means I get built in vacations four times a year. I don’t get paid for them but if I need it I do have the option of going in, finding random work to do, and making a little money. I just don’t want to this week.

I’ve worked this job for about 9 years and just about every year I work through all of our breaks, finding extra work wherever I can, but this year is different. This year I am trying to get serious about writing and I think taking a week to shut myself in and really brainstorm some ideas, work on an outline, maybe make some art, or write a piece for a submission call, all sounds much better than going into my day job.

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If we were having coffee I would tell you that yesterday I spent the afternoon at a friends bridal shower. I went into it thinking I would be bored and irritated through the whole thing but I ended up having a ton of fun. I didn’t really know anyone there but they all tried hard not to make me feel left out. That and the amount of margaritas and jello shot being passed around made for a very fun afternoon.

When we left I told my girlfriend that I really wanted to get serious about our wedding. We’ve been engaged for about 2 years now. We had planned on being married by now but so much has happened since I proposed to her that we never could focus on planning the damn thing. Things are beginning to settle down now and I think it’s time we make this happen. Watching friends get married before us is making me anxious.

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If we were having coffee I would tell you that the highlight of my week was getting my Star Wars: The Force Awakens tickets for opening day, December 18th. I know, I know, this sounds incredibly nerdy but let me tell you, it wasn’t easy getting the tickets. Many major movie ticket sellers sites were down due to it being the biggest surge in ticket sales in history. Hell, even the trailer broke viewing records.

So last Monday night I sat up refreshing both Fandango’s site and the Alamo Drafthouse’s site, both of which had been down for hours. Then I checked Facebook and realized people were heading to the theaters to buy tickets in person. I freaked! Tickets were selling out and I couldn’t even get on the sites to buy! So I called the theater and my girlfriend was sweet enough to sit on hold for 30 minutes to make sure I could be there on opening day. I’m glad she supports my geeky interests.

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If we were having coffee I would tell you that I am working hard to start a journaling habit again. I bought a bright red Shinola brand notebook over the summer but it was so pretty that I could never write in it. I finally got over that and every afternoon I write a summary of my feelings that day and on the opposite page I write a list of five good things that happened. Below that I also add a short sentence or two about my hopes or fears for the next day.

I forget sometimes but it’s getting better. I carry the notebook with me wherever I go and this week I’m going to set a reminder in my phone. I hope that it will get to be just as strong a habit as blogging has become. I want it to be something I look forward to every day and I want to feel a little “off” if I don’t get it done. I think it’s important that I supplement my writing here with something analog. It keeps the brain healthy you know.

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If we were having coffee I would tell you that, sadly, my coffee is gone, and I have work to do, so I had better go. I would love to stay longer and trust me I could use another cup but my house is a mess and the dog is demanding attention and exercise so I have to run.

I really hope you had a wonderful week, but either way, let me know how you are and what you’ve been up to in the comments :)

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Lola bun :)

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Colorado In The Fall and How I Am Learning to Cope with Help From My Readers

This past Sunday I received quite a few comments on my weekly coffee sharing post regarding my hatred for autumn and how much or how little that had to do with the fact that I live in Colorado. There were a lot of comments but most were in favor of fall and many thought I was looking at this all wrong. Some had even been to Colorado and thought that it wasn’t that bad, or that Colorado was just beautiful and I just wasn’t seeing it.

When it was all said and done I think my mind was changed a little. Maybe I really have been just seeing autumn the wrong way. The way I see it now, fall just looks like everything around me is sad and dying. The leaves changing isn’t beautiful, it’s a daily reminder that pretty soon all the pretty green stuff is going to be gone and it is going to be cold and snowing. That cool breeze that means you can finally start wearing all you favorite sweaters just means that soon there will be no more fun things to do.

All the amusement parks and pools will be closed. All the patios at the bars will be for the hard core smokers only. There will be no more movie event, or festivals or ‘fests. The pretty green parks will be bare and empty of human laughter. Ok, I’m exaggerating a bit but mostly all of this is true.

My favorite comment on the subject, and the one that inspired this post, came from Sarah:

Fall has always been my favorite season with winter a close second.
Fall here in Florida is a continuation of summer and I hate summers here,
I love fall in the rest of the country.

Watching the leaves change from green to all the colors of the rainbow. Or if you happen to live in Colorado they change to a bright golden /red color. Simply beautiful.

I love how the air is fresher. I can open my windows and spell the fresh air.
My steps become alive again and I start walking. I am rejuvenated.
The animals gives birth and we watch them walk through the yard here.
Winter is warmer here and you would enjoy that. For me I long for the winters out West. The cold is warmed by the bright sun. It fresh and clear and sunny.

My reply to such a beautiful comment:

Oh my gosh, what a wonderful comment. The way you describe your love of autumn almost makes me change my mind, then I remember that here fall means cold, and wind, and snow. I do happen to live in Colorado and the leaves are turning very yellow right now. Sounds like I should be living somewhere like Florida, where fall is just summer 2.0.

I’ve often told people that I should move further south, and I would, except for the extreme conservatism everywhere. I have thought about southern California as well but the cost of living is high. So I am staying here for the forseeable future, which is okay because I really do love this state, I just hate the winter.

Sarah reblogged my post and I got another comment from one of her readers:

Ahhh it makes sense, your in Colorado, I understand completely….We drove through your beautiful state….I was mesmerized….I fell in love with Manitou Springs, we spent a week there, Cortez National Park, amazing…and we went over Lizard Pass…wow I thought I was in the Alp’s…..love it….glad to have coffee with you anytime..akthy

I will say that we have some of the best scenery that you can get in this country. Routine drives to work and home give you spectacular views of the mountains and amazing displays of color in every sunrise and sunset. The mountains are often purple or orange tinged and this time of year, the fall I hate so much, means the beginning of them getting their pristine white tips back. I do love the way the mountains look with snow on them and I admit that in the summer they seem a little drab.

The air here also does become much clearer and fresher. Most summers the sky gets pretty hazy due to California’s continual forest fires. Sometimes it’s so bad we can’t see the mountains at all. We can smell it coming in and the haze gives everyone the worst allergies. In the fall the fires die down and the sky becomes clearer. We get a better view of the mountains too.

We are also lucky that even though it gets very cold, the sun is usually shining. I read once that Colorado gets an average of 300 sunny days a year. In other parts of the country people go long stretches of time with clouds hovering and rain and snow coming down constantly. We get a good amount of snow, and we do get it in the fall, but it’s not that bad and we do have the sun to cheer us, even of the temperatures stay below freezing for a few months..

Speaking of the snow and the mountains we do have quite the booming winter tourist season. I do not partake, in fact I am one of the few Denver natives here who have never gone, and probably never will go skiing. I do like all the money this brings to the state and I do take pride in this fact. People come from all over the world to ski our slopes!….Maybe I ought to give it a try, everyone else can’t be wrong about this.

Then I remember that I still hate it and it’s basically a useless season anyway.

I’m starting to wonder if maybe it’s because Colorado’s fall is so short and uneventful that I feel this way. Here the weather goes from warm to cold quickly, there isn’t much transition. I joke that fall lasts about 2 weeks, same for spring, so the two seasons do feel pretty useless to me.

So yeah there are some good things about fall and maybe I am beginning to see things in a different light, but even so, I think most people like fall because it is a real fall. Here the seasons seem to change rather abruptly. I don’t feel like I have enough time to adjust or emotionally prepare and I spend the rest of winter being mad that there was no warning and I didn’t get to end the summer the way I wanted.

I sound like a brat I know. At least one person, Sonya, kinda-sorta agreed with me:

And I’m sort of with you on autumn. We had lovely warm weather here last week, and I liked that the wind had a bit of a sting to it. But it’s 8:30pm and pitch black outside, and soon the days will be shorter than the nights and I just hate that.

So having said all that, and having read all that my readers had to say, I think I should try a bit harder to enjoy autumn in Colorado. For one, it could be worse, people who live further north would think me a wuss complaining about what they would consider to be very fine weather, and two, there’s actually some good to it too. I just hadn’t really looked for it and instead moped around like a kid who is forced to go back to school.

I don’t want to be that way, and I don’t want to miss out on what might be a beautiful time of the year just because I wish another wouldn’t end. I want to see the good in it instead.

I will still miss the summer though. I feel the loss of it deeply and I feel it every year, and no amount of soft sweaters or pumpkin spice lattes is going to change that. I will enjoy them none the less though, because it is the least the universe could offer for putting me through that cold hell of winter.

Fall is about warmth, and cider, and colors, and pumpkin spice, and.. and…

wccunningham

In response to Daily Post’s Blogging U. course, Writing 101 assignment: Expand a comment

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